Barack Obama: House Negro?

Uh hello, infidels, remember us? Axis of Evil? The ones with the totally awesome videos?

If you missed it, your President-elect, Barack Obama, just got called an "abeed al-beit" by Al-Qaeda leader Ayman al-Zawahri. That means house slave, if you're wondering. Now, before we call Al Sharpton and start the cave sit-in (by the way Al's got his own problems), we have to take a second to absorb the significance of this moment.

The President of the United States just got called a house slave.

Wow.

That

is

freaking

amazing.

See, Whitefolks, that's what happens when you elect a Black man to be President. Before you know it, the leader of the free world is calling himself a mutt, Italians are joking that he's got a suntan, and terrorists are laughing behind your back. Welcome to the family!

And far be it for me to make light of the threat of Al-Qaeda, but I've been more concerned by the threat of Al-Palin.

Please take that away.

Plus, you know Obama can't take this personal. Until he won there was still a lot of Black folks saying that he wasn't really Black.

C'mon now, you know I was just playing.

And Al-Qaeda is just trying to make sense of this paradigm shift that Obama has brought into the world. The conflict with the West has been framed as being about race and religion, but now the enemy is a Black man with a Muslim father. That confuses things. The house Negro thing is a pretty sophisticated play--especially eluding to Malcolm X--but ultimately nobody's going for it. We know house Negroes:

Yes.

Yup.

Check.

Misathink yes.

I know, I know. But: yes.

Obama ain't one of these cats. This week Neobama ran a background check on a former President, hired a Black man to head the Justice Department, and made John McCain beg for a job. That's field Negro behavior.

You mad, ain't you? For real. Just admit it. You maaaaaaaaad.