Sunday, October 26, 2008

The Post-Hope Obama and Other Thoughts

1. I guess my question is now: if we go Black, will we ever go back? Where are we going to find jobs for all these old nefarious White men?

2. John McCain: It ain't tricking if you got it. Sure she spent $150,000 on a shopping spree and laced her 1st Dude in $5,000 worth of clothes and made sure Baby Trig had the latest in House of Dereon streetwear, but did you think they was going to let her get up in front of all them rich people wearing some old moose hunting camo? You betcha, not.

Get like me!

Come on now! Don't hate because a sista is trying to step her game up. I know Minnesota Congresswoman Super-American Michele Bachmann could use some of that change after she put her foot in her mouth and the RNC cut off her check, but there's an old Alaskan saying that applies here: it bees like that.

Besides, Cindy McCain spent twice that on one outfit.

Your man might be young, but so is your money.

By the way, you better get used to the Palin thing. Ole' girl ain't going nowhere and she's going to be major by the time we get to 2012.

2. It appears that election day is going to look like that scene from The Firm where Wilford Brimley starts talking crap to Tom Cruise and ends up getting bludgeoned with a briefcase for his trouble.
What's up with the hookup on one of them dia-beet-us commercials?

The big difference will be that a) Wilford Brimley is actually younger than John McCain (no lie) and b) Barack is going to be flashing that smile while he's swinging away, probably whistling 99 Problems.

3. But what happens after the election? Republicans are running around like roaches with the lights cut on because they say that Barack will have one of the largest mandates of the last couple decades, will have control of both houses of congress, and will have access to an executive branch that is more powerful (and corrupt) than its ever been. I believe in Barack and what he says he's going to do, but it makes me a little nervous too. The most important thing he can do for this country is bring balance back to the Executive branch. I know there's a lot of things that he wants to do, but he's going to have to show some restraint or the unconstitutional changes that Bush made will be set, and be even harder to undo. Luckily, I think he gets that. We'll see.
Just be sure to maintain the dignity of the office.

4. I've been getting posted at school and haven't had time to post, but it really hurt my feelings when I couldn't write about the passing of my man Levi Stubbs. That brother could sang! It's hard for me to think of anyone who used the urgency and passion of his voice to tell a story. The first time I heard him sing Bernadette, I knew what it meant to marry tone with narrative. That's a big loss.

4. And Dolemite died too. I'm not sure how to feel about that because Dolemite always seemed like such a minstrel actor to me, but his movies are so bad that they're almost good. I guess it's kind of related to my dilemma about what I'm going to wear for Halloween. I would like to go as Sir Nose D'Voidoffunk, but I know everybody's just going to think I'm dressed as a pimp. Obviously that's not a good look for a teacher of impressionable youth. And plus, now it's cool for White people to have Pimp and Ho parties, and that makes me want to hurt someone. So, Dolemite, I love you, but I hate your pimp game.


5. By the way, I knew that McCain supporter was lying about getting tattooed by some Angryblackman. That didn't make any sense from the beginning and shows why diversity is so important: an ignorant person will tell an ignorant lie. She needs to get some Black friends or hang out at Popeye's or go to a barber shop or something, than she could come with something believable. Brothers that are sitting around ATMs waiting for White women are not looking to make a political statement--they just trying to get your money. In fact, Michelle Obama is more likely to get robbed by a brother at an ATM than a White woman. Sad, but true.



Nina K. said...

She ain't coming back in 2012. She wishes. Barack is gonna smash on her so hard. She WAS a big fish in a small pond...after she loses her next gubernatorial election she'll just be a Fox news anchor and try to ruin the world along with Michelle Malkin. That's my prediction. =)

Abdel Shakur said...

I hear you, but I wouldn't be so sure. She's got a look and a tone that resonates with a lot of people. The Republicans are certainly not going to toss her out, especially with the current state of their leadership. With a little coaching and the right handlers she could be a force. Besides, no one thought Bush Jr. had a shot, but look what happened.
I think you're right about her leaving Alaska, though. I don't think she'll be defeated, but she'll opt for something like Fox News where she can talk a lot of trash and not have to be accountable for doing anything.