Dear Whitefolks,It looks like you done figured it out. Apparently, you discovered our secret plot. Perhaps you uncovered the cache of fried chicken and hotwings we were saving for field rations. Or maybe it was all the Colt 45 bottles we were stashing to use as Molotov Cocktails. Or perhaps you simply read the trails of our watermelon seeds.
But now that we've been found out, we might as well come clean:
Yes, if Barack Obama is not elected President of the United States on November 4th, Blackfolks are going to riot.
I know it's been several years since we had our last riot, but lately we have been a little anxious. First there was the whole OJ thing, which we were going to riot about, but forgot to. And then there was the Kwame Kilpatrick thing, which came at a completely awful time for us to riot--maybe if it had been after the first of the month. But honestly, we've been feeling a little ignored.
For a while we weren't sure how we fit into the whole Axis of Evil/Terrorist-thing because it seems you Whitefolks' attention has been pulled away from us. Now there's the Arabs (this includes Iranians because only terrorists would try and make a distinction), the Chinese (sneaky!), the Russians (sneakier!), and even Somali pirates (can those people even swim!?) to be afraid of.
Obama has helped us remember that we aren't really that different from the Arabs, as far as you're concerned. But you have been kind of slipping lately. Your racism these days is kind of weak. Subtle, even.
You can't blame us for getting a little uppity. Remember what you always used to tell us: "give a N an inch..."We didn't have anyone to remind us of our place. We even started believing that this Black man. This Brother. Could actually be President of the United States. That maybe there would come a day where you wouldn't be running things. How could you let us think such dangerous thoughts! You know we are an emotional people! WE TEND TO TALK IN CAPITAL FONTS AND USE EXCESSIVE PUNCTUATION!!!!!!!!!
But now you know. It's not too late. Even if we riot, who really cares because we only burn up our own communities? It's not like our streets are that peaceful to begin with (LOLOLOLOLOLOL). And so what if Obama is the better candidate and everybody knows it? There is still time to put us in our place and let us know who is boss.
You are still our plumber and we are still your moose.
With loving sincerity,
Blackfolks
PS. BTW, even if he wins, we still gone riot. You know we crazy! :)
5 comments:
If Senator Obama wins this election, the following is what it has taken to get a very questionable, extremely inexperienced, very junior first time Senator past the mark:
1. Senator Obama’s campaign is outspending Senator McCain’s campaign 4 to 1 or more in some locations. This is due to Senator Obama backing out of an agreement he made with Senator McCain.
2. Senator Obama’s campaign has opened up about 700 offices nation-wide versus less than 100 than Senator McCain’s campaign has opened up.
3. The mainstream media has been completely biased against Senator McCain.
4. Biased organizations, such as ACORN, have received contributions from Senator Obama, have been openly supporting Senator Obama, and are under investigation for committing voter registration fraud in multiple states favoring Senator Obama.
5 An enormous number of biased celebrities have been supporting Senator Obama and speaking out against Senator McCain.
6. Even though Congress is very unpopular, both sides are controlled by the democrats and have been making biased statements against Senator McCain.
7. Senator McCain is disadvantaged because of the unpopularity of the incumbent President.
8. All four of the debate moderators lean to the left and were not 100% fair.
Even with all of the biased and unfair things mentioned above that are running against Senator McCain, Senator Obama only has a narrow lead. Should he not be way out in front? I have heard people state that on the news from both campaigns. That should tell you something. Also, Senator Obama pulled a cheap shot on Senator McCain and the American public in regards to campaign financing. Both campaigns agreed to use public financing during the presidential campaign. At the last moment, Senator Obama backed out of his agreement and took private financing, giving Senator Obama a significant advantage over Senator McCain in financing his campaign. In addition, Senator Obama is not being totally open as to where all his contributions are coming from. But even though Senator Obama took a sucker punch and tricked Senator McCain and all Americans by backing out of his agreement, Senator McCain is keeping with his word and using public financing. This is severely disadvantaging Senator McCain’s campaign financing by putting much lower caps on the amount of money he will have available. This is the reason Senator Obama can outspend Senator McCain 4 to 1. This also shows that Senator Obama does not keep his campaign promises, just like his past campaign promises.
Just imagine what it will be like when you have both the House of Representatives and the Senate controlled by the democrats, and Senator Obama in the Whitehouse signing everything that comes across his desk from them. In other words, the person writing the check will also be the one cashing it. There will be no “checks and balances”, especially if the democrats pick up a few more seats in the Senate and it becomes filibuster-proof, which means they will have a monopoly. Again, there will be no checks and balances. We will have higher taxes, more government, and fewer rights. They have already promised all of those things. You will have a government that will tax the people that are creating the jobs so they can “spread the wealth around”. Who do you think creates the jobs in this country? Have you ever seen a business owned by a poor person? Are they the ones starting small businesses and creating jobs? Obviously not! So we have established the fact that the people that own the small businesses and create the jobs are NOT the poor. So lets talk about what is going to happen when they start taxing the people that do own the small businesses that create the jobs.
So what do you think will happen when they start taxing the small business owners? First, jobs will be lost. They will not be able to afford to keep the same amount of people they have now – they will have to let people go. In addition, they will not be able to expand their businesses and hire more people. The second thing that will happen is that prices will go up. Do you think businesses will not raise the cost of their products and services to offset the extra taxes they have to pay? This should be obvious. The prices will go up on everything and will affect everybody – to include the middle class and the poor. When you go to the grocery store, the food prices will be higher. When you go buy a car, the prices will be higher. When you go to the department store the prices are going to be higher. Put yourself in the shoes of a business owner; if your expenses go up, would you not raise the price of your products to pay for them? Of course you would! And taxes are an expense.
Now lets talk about presidential qualifications. When a federal employee or a member of the military has a need to have access to classified materials, they would need to get a security clearance. A security clearance attempts to certify that an individual is of high moral character and does not pose a security risk. If a federal employee or a member of the military admits to using a dangerous drug, such as cocaine, they will not be eligible for a security clearance. In addition, an admitted cocaine user would not be able to get in the military and if he or she is a federal employee, he or she would be moved to a position of lesser responsibility and not have access to classified materials. Senator Obama has admitted to using cocaine in his book that he wrote. As a candidate for president, should he not be held up to the same standards of a federal employee or a member of our military? As President, he is going to be exposed to an enormous amount of classified materials, have his finger on the nuke button, and be the commander in chief of the strongest military in the world. Would you not want someone in that position that can qualify for a security clearance?
Another point I would like to make is in regards to Senator Obama’s experience, which is a drop in the bucket compared to Senator McCain’s. With the world and the economy in such a delicate position, I cannot imagine why anyone would not want the most experienced person in the Whitehouse. Hillary Clinton, Bill Clinton, and even Senator Obama’s running mate, Senator Joe Biden, have made statements to the fact that Senator Obama is not experienced enough to be President and that the presidency is not the type of job for on-the-job training. They also said that Senator McCain brings a lifetime of experience to the table. Senator Obama’s running mate, Senator Biden, even said he would even be honored to run “with” his friend John McCain. These individuals are now claiming that they said that during the primaries when they were running against Senator Obama. Does that mean they were lying then, or now? Senator Obama claimed that he had more diverse foreign policy experience because he lived overseas as a kid. Living overseas does not give you foreign policy experience, unless you are an Ambassador, which he was not. If it did, then Senator John McCain would again best Senator Obama’s record since he has lived overseas being a member of the military.
What issue or issues are you going to base your voting decision on? Will it be the economy? National defense? Education? There are so many out there. Because of the current economic situation, a large number of you are going to base your decision on who is best for the economy. I would hope that I have answered this question for you earlier on in this article. Such as pointing out which candidate has promised to raise taxes and spend more reducing jobs and raising the cost to live. But just in case I have not, I have a couple additional items for you to think about. If you look at all of the campaign promises on Senator Obama’s web site, you will see hundreds of them. How is he going to pay for them? I think I answered that already. But, if you add of the costs of all of them, mathematically it is going to cost us a lot more than he will be able to raise in taxes. So many of these are going to be just like so many of his previous campaign promises – they won’t get done. Maybe the economy is not the best issue to use in making a decision for president. What about national defense? In my opinion, if you don’t have a secure nation, the rest of the issues are moot. With Russia and China outspending us two fold to build up their military; with Iran and North Korea toying around with nukes and making threats; with Russia making friends and conducting military exercises not too far from our back door in Venezuela; with Russia helping Iran build nuclear processing material plants; and with the terrorist threat growing in Pakistan (a nuclear country), Afghanistan, Africa, and several other countries throughout the world, I want the most experienced and tested person in that office. Not some junior Senator that has absolutely no experience in national security. The economy is important, but national defense is a must. Remember, if our country is not secure, then the economy means nothing, our freedom is in jeopardy, and our lives as we know them today could easily be drastically changed in a moments notice. Just ask the citizens of the country of Georgia. One last point: Have you see who is openly supporting Senator Obama in the news? Iran and the terrorist groups Hamas and Hezbollah have made public statements that they would prefer Sen. Obama to win. Go figure.
So after reading this, where do you stand? The differences in these two candidates are very apparent. On one hand, you have an individual with many years of applicable “real world” experience, has been a public servant and leader for about 50 years, has a proven record to reduce taxes and government spending, and is dedicated to growing the US economy and jobs. On the other hand, you have an individual with very little experience, questionable associations, has a proven record to increase taxes, government spending, and earmarks, and has promised to increase taxes and government spending. As I said at the beginning of this article, I cannot imagine why anyone in their right mind, after doing a real comparison of the two candidates, would vote for Senator Obama. I admit, he presents himself well and has a good appearance, as long as he has a teleprompter to read from. So the bottom line is what do you want in the next president, appearance or substance?
Dear Glen M,
Thanks for stopping by. Even though you didn't address any of the points I made in my post, and your comment is actually sloppy seconds from a reply you did to a post on rantburg (http://rantburg.com/poparticle.php?ID=254159&D=2008-11-01&SO=&HC=6) I do appreciate you taking time out of your busy day. Now to your points about Senator Obama:
1. You know you can't trust an N to keep his word.
2. Your fears are unfounded. They are probably just selling crack out of those offices.
3. You're right. The mainstream media has made John McCain look like a lying old cretin who will do anything to become president. Shame on you mainstream media!
4. Again, you're right! I'm just so glad that the Republicans are taking the lead towards making sure we conduct a free and fair election--the same way they did in 2000 and 2004.
5. THOSE DAMN CELEBRITIES AND THEIR BIASES! (PLEASE EXCUSE MY EXCESSIVE CAPITALIZATION AND PUNCTUATION!!!! LIKE I SAID IN THE POST, WE'RE AN EMOTIONAL PEOPLE.) We need to start electing different celebrities, ones that are not biased!
6. Is nothing sacred? Now the Democrats are biased against Republicans?
7. I'm glad you didn't mention the "incumbent President" by name. It seems like every time they show his face the stock market crashes. And besides, a candidate shouldn't be judged merely on his associations, unsavory as they may be. T'aint fair!
8. I think this does relate to your earlier point. Those moderators did every thing they could do to make Governor Palin sound like a ignoramus and Senator McCain sound like a crazy old coot. I appreciate your restraint, but I would say they were only about 17% fair.
Thanks again for clearing this up, Glen.
-MK
dang, fellas ... serious business.
and props for the dunbar reference. :-)
so are you gonna be in downtown chicago on election night?
i know you wouldn't be one of those guys scalping tickets on craigslist...http://gawker.com/5075286/obama-tickets-bring-out-the-craigslist-crazies
I wish, man. I'm probably going to have my butt at the house in front of the TV, trying to lesson plan for the next day, hoping that kids don't think Wednesday is a holiday.
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